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beautiful London escorts

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Why cheap London escorts offer no strings attached

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cheap London escorts

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You don’t know how to look for love

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You don't know how to look for love

The most common criteria on dating sites are the least predictive of romantic happiness.

The science of romantic relationships, it must be admitted, is a niche discipline. Harry Reis , a researcher at the University of Rochester in New York State, has compared it to adolescence in these terms: “more mysterious than we would like”. However, progress in this area deserves our full attention. Wired magazine picked up on it through the book Don’t Trust Your Gut – Using Data to Get What You Really Want in Life , written by Seth Stephens-Davidowitz , a Harvard-educated Ph.D. in economics and former Google employee.

In this book, the economist returns to several studies, including that of Samantha Joel , a scientist who is interested in what can make a relationship have the best possible chance of being fulfilled. The researcher brought together numerous pre-existing studies and created a team of eighty-six scientists, who collected data on more than 11,196 couples – all heterosexual, therefore not representative of all existing romantic relationships.

In October 2019, the results were presented at the University of Waterloo , Canada, under the title “Can we help those who want it to choose the best partner?”

Surprising results

The first conclusion that Samantha Joel draws from this study is this: romantic relationships are absolutely unpredictable. The values ​​and tastes of individuals, like many other data, would in reality have very little impact on the possibility of being happy as a couple. Even an artificial intelligence has failed to unlock the secret of happiness in love. Some conclusions are nonetheless useful.

If the study does not correctly predict the variables likely to lead to a happy relationship, significant results were obtained for a variable that concerns not the partner sought, but the person looking for a partner. So when you ask someone, “Were you happy before you were in a relationship?” , if the answer is “yes”, then the chances of him being happy in his relationship are higher.

Data science thus tends to confirm the adage that “the only person who can make you happy is yourself”. Don’t be disappointed, the most important part of the demonstration is coming.

The study also highlights a list of variables that are among the least predictive of romantic happiness. In this case: ethnic origin, religion , height, profession, physical attractiveness, relationship history, sexual tastes, and similarities with oneself.

In parallel with this study, scientists analyzed dating sites and looked at what people are looking for in a future partner. Most singles are almost always based on the same criteria, grouped into a list that includes height or physical attractiveness, among other things.

The most impressive correlation between all these studies is this: the list of the least predictive criteria for happiness in love, from the study by Samantha Joel, almost perfectly matches that of the most searched criteria on dating … read

Is there a risk of divorce after psychoanalysis?

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Is there a risk of divorce after psychoanalysis

Hearing what the unconscious has to tell us usually carries risks.

In It’s not turning round , Mardi Noir, psychologist and psychoanalyst, returns each week to a psychological question or problem.

And if I focused on the term “risk”. Yes, there is quite a salutary risk to be taken in order to meet one’s truth, one’s desire. The closer we approach it, the less certain we are of wanting to know more. However, it is on. It is always possible to go back, only, what pushed the subject at the start to have to unravel his symptoms risks continuing to make noise, in spite of his pleas.

In the documentary Rendez-vous chez Lacan , Gérard Miller remembers the words of the famous psychoanalyst. Miller had shared with him the difficulty he was encountering in pursuing his own analysis and Lacan had replied that what one finds there is not always what one thought one wanted. So much so that he was skeptical of those who came to see him to get to know each other better. Insufficient reason, according to him, to take the risk of hearing what the unconscious has to tell us. Something must be wrong to risk it.

To risk, from the Latin resecum : what cuts. Still in this documentary, which I recommend to you with enthusiasm, Gérard Miller questions a former analysand of Lacan, Antonio Di Ciaccia, who, at the time of entering analysis, was a priest. For him, Lacan “caused a split between an ideal to which [he] had held since childhood. [He] entered the convent at 10 and ordained a priest at 25. [Lacan] made a cut between this ideal and what was [his] passion.” I imagine that this gentleman means “passion” in the religious sense, this action of enduring one’s suffering.

And then a symptom arises

What should be noted is that at the time of filming, he is married and a father. He has, in a way, divorced himself from the Church . And to the question, probably even more relevant: “Has psychoanalysis detached you from the Church, but also from God?” , Di Ciaccia responds: “It’s weird, it’s stayed the same. I doubted before and I doubt now. Still, can this be considered bizarre? Or on the contrary of an almost implacable logic? I have no idea why he entered analysis, only the change of situation can lead us to some leads.

Most of the time we are stuck, entangled in a whole bunch of imaginary projections of what our lives should be like. For Di Ciaccia, as we have understood, this was organized by the religious, bathed in a strong cultural environment. He is very young when he takes this path. In the same way that a young girl can identify with the place of the family, of the couple , of motherhood without really questioning this course. … read

How did we talk about love in the Middle Ages?

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How did we talk about love in the Middle Ages

During the second half of the Middle Ages, courtly literature codified love: how to access it as well as how to tell it.

Professor emeritus of medieval literature at the University of Le Mans, Joël Blanchard is a specialist in late medieval literature . He worked extensively on political figures such as Philippe de Commynes and Louis XI and edited a large number of works from this period. In Poétiques de l’amour , he departs from his favorite fields to evoke courtly literature, its relationship to love and to women. With mixed success.

The book essentially deals with courtly literature and its avatars. The expression “courtly love”, invented by Gaston Paris in 1883 , did not exist in the Middle Ages, which preferred the expression ” fin’amor ” (“pure love” in Occitan). This poetic form, which appeared around the 11th and 12th centuries , celebrates the love between a servant knight and his noble lady, according to very specific codes which reproduce the social order and the hierarchy between lord and vassal.

Of course, this new poetic form does not arise suddenly: it draws its roots from ancient traditions. The texts of Saint Paul and the fathers of the Church are well known to authors of the Middle Ages and constitute an essential matrix. Augustine’s theory , which advocates marriage as a remedy for concupiscence, notably influences the perception of medieval love.

Trials to “Better”

The development of a discourse on love in the literature of the twelfth century is also due to the rediscovery of ancient texts and to the Gregorian reform , this vast enterprise of reform of the Church which redefines the relations between clerics and laity, but also between men and women.

Among the ancient texts, the sulphurous Art of loving by the Roman poet Ovid occupies a special place. Very often copied in the twelfth century , this manual is full of advice for men and women seeking to seduce, in a more or less honest way: it provides poets of the Middle Ages with a framework of thought. Finally, medical discourse also influences poetic expressions of love: doctors sometimes associate courtly love with illness, because it involves suffering . Too much love, not enough love, all contribute to the imbalance of moods and can cause illness.

These theological and medical discourses are coupled with the social organization of the second half of the Middle Ages to model courtly love. Most of the themes of courtesy are already present in the ten poems attributed to Guillaume, Duke of Aquitaine , at the end of the 11th and the beginning of the 12th century.

The themes of love from afar, absence and prohibitions are at the heart of this literature which creates new standards for expressing love.

Like William, troubadours who sing of courtly love were often aristocrats who express chivalrous love. The lady’s love is … read